Zombie Honeymoon

I just watched the trailer for the new Jurassic Park movie. It looks amazing. In unrelated news last night I watched a movie called Zombie Honeymoon. With a name like that I was expecting big things, but it really was a bit of a letdown. I suppose it was a sort of plodding treatise on love and commitment, lots of really overly long shots of people doing what one assumes to be thinking, but really they mostly looked like they were in really bad adverts for perfume or levis or something, and not really very many zombies at all. The storyline is not dissimilar to that of Warm Bodies, but not nearly as charming. Here a zombified guy asks his girl to stick with him as he becomes increasingly gross and violent and she, on the whole, is pretty alright about it all. Herein lays the issue though, there are precisely two zombies in this film. For someone sitting down expecting about a million zombies to attack some idiots on their honeymoon, this really is a load of balls. One gets the sense that the film makers really like zombie movies, but didn’t want to go all out cheesy and good fun. In their wisdom they have introduced so much ‘trying to be pretentious’ balls that it is really not much fun at all, nor, because the being pretentious doesn’t really come off, is it that interesting. I can’t work out if it is supposed to be some sort of complicated allegory for domestic violence or something, or maybe a testament to love, or if the five minute long hallucinogenic scene towards the end really was an oblique reference to 2001. Who knows, who cares really, I am still grumpy with it for tricking me into thinking there would be millions of zombies – in wedding dresses and tuxedos.

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